I Held Her Newborn in My Arms—Knowing He Might Be Mine

I wasn’t supposed to be in the room. Her husband was out grabbing coffee, and I was just there to “drop off flowers.”

That’s what I told myself, anyway.

But when I walked in and saw Salome glowing like that, cradling the tiny baby in her arms, something in me cracked. I should’ve left. I should’ve said congratulations and backed out like a normal person. But instead, I just stood there, frozen at the foot of the bed.

She looked up, eyes soft, tired, and said, “Do you want to hold him?”

I didn’t answer. I just nodded. My heart was doing this wild pounding thing in my chest, like it already knew.

He was so small. Warm. Peaceful. His little face was scrunched up in that half-sleep newborn way. But when I looked closer… I saw it. The chin. The eyes. Not hers. Not her husband’s either.

I’d tried to forget that one night six months ago. She said it was a mistake. A weak moment. We promised it would never happen again.

But now I was holding a maybe.

“I haven’t told him yet,” she whispered.

“Are you going to?”

Salome didn’t answer. Just looked at me with that same complicated smile. Then the door handle turned.

And standing there, coffee in one hand and balloons in the other, was Markus—her husband.

He paused for half a second, confused but smiling. “Oh, hey! Didn’t know we had company.”

I handed the baby back to Salome like I was returning a borrowed coat and took two quick steps back. “Just dropping off flowers,” I said, my voice too cheery, too fake.

Markus didn’t seem to notice. He leaned in, kissed Salome’s forehead, and handed her the drink. “I got the vanilla one you like.”

She murmured a thank you. I mumbled something about needing to get back to work and practically ran out of the room.

In the hallway, I leaned against the wall, heart still rattling like a coin in a tin can. I couldn’t unsee the baby’s face. Couldn’t un-know what I now suspected.

I hadn’t spoken to Salome in months. Not since that night. I’d kept my distance for both our sakes. But the baby—he changed everything.

I didn’t sleep that night. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw his face again. Those same almond-shaped eyes I saw in the mirror each morning. The same curve to the chin. It wasn’t definitive, but it was enough to crack open a world of what-ifs.

The next day, I didn’t go to work. I went to the hospital again.

This time, Salome was alone. She didn’t look surprised to see me.

“You’re early,” she said.

“I didn’t sleep.”

“Me neither.”

I sat in the chair by her bed. The baby was sleeping in the clear plastic crib beside her.

“I need to know,” I said. “Is he mine?”

She stared at the wall, chewing the inside of her cheek like she always did when she was nervous.

“I don’t know,” she finally said. “I did the math a hundred times. It could be Markus’s. But it could be yours.”

I nodded, trying not to let my heart fall out of my chest.

“Will you do a test?”

She looked at me then. Really looked at me. “Do you want that?”

I didn’t answer right away. Part of me wanted to know. Desperately. But another part of me feared what it might cost—for her, for me, for Markus.

“Do you love him?” I asked.

She didn’t flinch. “Yes. I do.”

That hurt more than I expected. I swallowed it down.

“And what about me?”

She closed her eyes. “You were a moment. A real one. But still… just a moment.”

A nurse knocked on the door then, ending the conversation.

I left again, this time with a tighter knot in my stomach. But I couldn’t stay away for long. Over the next few weeks, I checked in more often than I should have. “Just to see how they’re doing,” I told myself. But really, I just wanted to see the baby.

I started noticing things. How he didn’t look much like Markus. How he seemed to have my nose, my expressions. It drove me crazy. Salome noticed, too, even if she didn’t say anything.

Then, one afternoon, she called me.

“I scheduled the test,” she said. “You deserve to know.”

The next week felt like the longest of my life. The waiting was unbearable. I kept imagining both outcomes. In one version, I’m a father. In another, I’m nothing. Just a mistake.

When the results finally came in, I met Salome at a small park near her place. She was already sitting on the bench, envelope in hand.

“Did you open it?” I asked.

“No. I wanted to do it together.”

My hands were shaking as I tore it open. I skimmed the words, searching for the part that mattered.

Probability of paternity: 99.9%

I looked up. She was already crying.

“So, it’s true,” I said quietly.

She nodded. “He’s yours.”

The world didn’t spin. It didn’t shatter. It just… shifted.

“What now?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” she said. “I haven’t told Markus. I don’t know how.”

We sat in silence. The weight of the truth pressed down on both of us.

“I want to be in his life,” I finally said. “Not to ruin yours. But I have to be.”

“I know.”

Weeks passed before she found the courage to tell Markus. And when she did, everything exploded.

He moved out for a while. Said he needed time. Anger. Betrayal. Sadness. It all poured out of him. I didn’t blame him.

But through it all, Salome stood firm. She didn’t beg. Didn’t hide. She told him the truth and let the pieces fall where they would.

I stayed away, waiting for the storm to pass.

One evening, Markus showed up at my place.

“I don’t hate you,” he said, standing awkwardly in my doorway. “But I can’t pretend this didn’t happen.”

“I understand.”

“I raised him in my mind for nine months. Talked to him through the belly. Painted his room. Chose his name.”

“I’m not trying to take your place.”

He looked at me for a long time. “He can have two dads. I’ll always love him. But he deserves to know the truth.”

And just like that, something unspoken passed between us. Not friendship. But maybe respect.

We found a strange balance after that. Salome and Markus stayed together, though things weren’t perfect. I saw the baby—Nico, they named him—on weekends. Held him, fed him, watched him sleep.

He started smiling when he saw me.

As months turned into a year, the pain softened. The awkwardness faded. Markus and I even started talking. Really talking. About music. Work. Even about Nico.

One night, over beers, he said, “I don’t know how we got here. But I’m glad you didn’t walk away.”

I smiled. “I thought about it. A hundred times.”

“Well, don’t. Nico’s lucky. He’s got two people who’d walk through fire for him.”

The real twist came two years later.

Salome sat me down and said, “I’m pregnant again. And it’s Markus’s. This time, I know for sure.”

She laughed when she said it, but her eyes were warm. She looked lighter, freer.

“You okay with all this?” she asked.

I nodded. “We’re not who we were. But I wouldn’t change a thing.”

Nico grew up with a big brother’s confidence and a wide, curious smile. He knew he had a mom, a dad, and a bonus-dad who loved him fiercely. He didn’t care about biology. He cared that we showed up.

And that’s what we did.

I didn’t get the woman. I didn’t get the picture-perfect family. But I got something else.

I got to become the kind of man I never knew I could be.

Sometimes, life doesn’t give you clean endings. Sometimes, the truth wrecks the pretty version of your story. But it also builds something stronger. Something real.

Love doesn’t always look like forever. Sometimes, it looks like showing up. Like telling the truth. Like letting go and still choosing to care.

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